I got up early, ironed my best shirt, (that would be the clean one that has no stains on it), fussed with my hair, gulped down some coffee, brushed my teeth, and headed out the door. I actually drove to the interview, even though it was only half a mile away, because I knew if I walked I'd be sweating like a whore in church. Or it would rain. Or both.
I walked in to the New Mobile Phone Shop, which was still being put together. There were men outside on ladders fiddling with a sign. There was product all over the floor, and two guys in khaki pants and polo shirts with the New Mobile Phone Shop logo on them.
"Hi, I'm looking for Mr. Mobile Guy?"
"Are you heybartender?" he asked, extending his hand.
"I am." I reached for his hand and shook it.
"We'll be talking over there," he said, gesturing in the direction of four dirty gray cloth-covered chairs sitting against an institutional gray wall.

I sat with my back to the wall, facing him. Behind him was the only decor in the room- a very large poster of a very satisfied Mobile Phone Customer, pretty and ethnic and smiling, standing in front of a tree. We talked for a while. He had a copy of my resume in front of him. He asked me about my job at the Local Liquor Store, about the Rock Club, and of course, the Big Stupid Box Store. We talked about customer service, about my scheduling needs, etc. I was doing very well. I knew it. I was relieved. Then he asked me if I had any questions.
Pay? Minimum wage. Plus commission, of course. On stuff that you sell. The ad on cr@igslist said that the average pay was $32,000. I find that difficult to believe.
Benefits? No.
How many employees? Three.
"That Guy (the only one hired so far) is full time, and we need another full time person, and one part time, per se." (He said "per se" a lot. I was starting to get hungry.)
Hours? At least 45 a week, but probably 50.
Vacation? "Not paid, per se, but it's up to you to take time off when you want. You just have to work it out with That Guy."
Also, I would be required to travel about three hours away for training, which will happen over the course of four or five days.
I couldn't get out of there fast enough. I shook his hand and practically ran to my car. I immediately went and filled out another application at a restaurant, then stopped in to follow up at a place I had already applied. There is a possibility there in the next couple weeks. I poked my head into another place that isn't hiring. I went over to the bakery to get something chocolate. The line was long. I was standing there for about thirty seconds when I started having a sort of panic attack. I went back to my car and drove home and got back on the computer to look for another job. I guess I'll be calling the restaurant lady back. If I didn't already mention it, I did get a call back from an application I filled out a couple weeks ago. The restaurant isn't what I would call my cup of tea, but it is one of very few in the town so it will likely be busy, it's only fifteen minutes away, and it can't possibly be as soul sucking as the New Mobile Phone Shop. Plus, they pay minimum (not "restaurant minimum", but actual minimum wage) plus tips. So it looks like I might be going that route. Unless somebody else calls me back soon.