I'm finally internetting from the house, which means- yep, you guessed it- photo time! Yay!

First up, a view from the bottom of our hill, which I have dubbed "The Ass Burner":

I remarked today after the b.h. and I returned from the grocery store that it was good we hadn't bought any new pants before we left. I suspect a month or two of this thing will mean smaller sizes for both of us.

This is the view looking back from about halfway up:


And one from the top:


The very bottom of this picture is where the last one was taken from. This thing is serious.

And the end result:



The funny thing is that the path into the (miles and miles of) woods behind our house is almost vertical, but for some reason it doesn't seem to hurt the way the Ass burner does. Maybe because on the way home from the woods you go down hill. I'll try to get some pictures of that path later in the week.

Employment?

From the local classifieds:

Big Top Tour Cook!
Run away with the circus this year as a Big Top
Cook!

Working from our 8' x 18' fully-equipped mobile
kitchen, you will be responsible for helping to
provide nutritious, tasty, filling and economical
meals for the cast and crew of the Circus Smirkus
Big Top Tour. Following the rehearsal period in
Greensboro, VT, the tour travels throughout New
England. Prior food service experience required.

Greetings from the Green Mountain State.

So I'm sitting in a bakery, which is run by the Culinary School. I have just inhaled a spinach and cheese croissant (I tried very hard to pause and really savor it, but it was small and delicious and I was hungry), and am working my way through a very large cup of coffee.
Since we last spoke, I have driven from Athens to New Orleans and back, stopping to eat and rock and walk and walk and walk and eat and drink too much coffee and take a bunch of pictures and talk to a voodoo priest. More on this later.
After that I ate again at El Sol, packed things into boxes, went out for a final drink with several co-workers, who are very generous and lovely people that I will miss, came home and packed more, slept fitfully, picked up a Monstrous 24 foot Moving Truck drove it, white knuckled, back to the house and up our impossibly overgrown driveway, packed more, packed the truck (with the help of some of those co-workers I mentioned previously), forgot some things, left some things, had a "yard sale" and a final farewell at Happy Hour at Flicker, packed some more, slept a little, packed some more, cleaned as much as possible (but not nearly enough- apologies to John), and finally hit the road only two hours later than planned.
The first day was not difficult, once we got going and I got used to driving said Monstrous Truck. The dogs were in our car with the b.h.'s sister and her fiance'. They were having a good time. We switched vehicles somewhere in North Carolina, and I drove the car into D.C., where we stayed the night. We slept at said sister & fiance's apartment, got up early, and drove again. This time I started the day driving the car, which was a huge relief because as you may or may not be aware, Pennsylvania is chock full of mountains and they were foggy and the roads were crowded and I was glad not to be piloting the Monstrous Truck through them. Glad, that is, until it was my turn to drive the Monstrous Truck and it started to rain. And then it got dark, and there are actually quite a few mountains in this state as well- thus the name, I guess.
Anyway, it was scary, but we made it, and when we got here the exit felt like a vertical drop rather than a ramp, and we discovered that our street is better for goats than people, and probably not good at all for Monstrous Trucks.
Our landlord was waiting for us at the house, which we had seen only in pictures up to that point. It was smaller than I expected, but not smaller than the house we had just moved out of. There were small things that you wouldn't notice in pictures- peeling wallpaper here, non-existent heat vents there, and the fact that the whole place leans, and not necessarily in the same direction- but overall we were happy. Mostly we were exhausted. Also, it had taken longer to get here than we expected, so it was dark and we couldn't get our beds out of the truck. We slept on dog beds and piles of blankets in the middle of the living room. I woke up nose to nose with Wyatt. I am not sure which of us had worse breath.
We were smart enough to hire some help, and two hours later two Very Lanky Movers appeared at the door. They backed the Monstrous Truck into the driveway and began emptying it right away. Two hours later, the truck was empty and the furniture in place, the rest of the house piled high with boxes. The Very Lanky Movers were magical. The only thing that even slowed them slightly was the Giant Oak Bookcase, which they dead-lifted twice and maneuvered through three doorways with nary a complaint. Beautiful. If you ever need to move, let me know. I'll give you their number.

Damn.

http://blogs.suntimes.com/derogatis/2009/05/jay_bennett_dead_at_age_45.html

Customer of the Day #3279

"Would you like a bag for that?"
"I'd like you to tie me up."
There were about ten people in line, and they all looked either uncomfortable or aghast. Without skipping a beat I replied, smiling:
"How about I tie you to the bumper of my car and drag you home?"
That broke the tension and got rid of the weirdo in one fell swoop.

So the week flew by. Worked Monday, off Tuesday, worked Wednesday, off Thursday. Saw Tim and Todd on Thursday night, and more importantly got to hang out with Tim and Katie and the band and Katie's aunt and uncle. The b.h. and I ate at El Sol again, which is only mildly weird. The waitress now knows my order by heart. Then we went down to soundcheck and ate at The grit with the out of towners. the show was lovely. Tim played "Just Like Home" for us, which was super cool because it's one of my favorite songs and because we're leaving and whatnot.
Had breakfast on Friday morning at Big City Bread, again with the out of town folk, then went home and napped before going to work. Worked my last shift yesterday, which was weird, even beyond the above mentioned customer. I have no job waiting in our new home, and I haven't been unemployed in years and years, so it feels kind of uncomfortable. Ah well. I'll get over it.
Today we had a yard sale. It went okay, but we're going to need yard sale part two before we leave. R & C almost burned their cars down trying to jump her battery, which was interesting. Other than that, just waiting for New Orleans. And looking for a dog sitter. Yep.

The weekend was pretty good, I suppose. It felt short. I didn't get to either of the early shows on Friday. S and A stopped by to see me at Nuci's Space, even though they had to get up early and couldn't stay for the show. The show was fine, but I drank a bit too much Smuttynose Imperial Stout and wound up nearly passing out in the middle of Lake City's set. No fault of theirs, mind you. They brought the rock. I was just exhausted and probably shouldn't have hit the high gravity beer.
Saturday I slept in and worked in the yard before going to work. I have been plucking some of my perennials from the yard and bringing them to S & T's house, since they would likely just get lost in the weeds here without much diligence. My rose bush is enormous. I can't help but feel a sense of gardener's pride every season when it blooms. I got that thing as a stick in a half gallon bucket, and now it is several feet tall by several feet wide, and has nearly covered the dead satellite dish I planted it next to. It smells fantastic, too. If I get less lazy later I'll try to post some pictures.
Sunday I went out with S and got some herbs and dirt. Since I'm planting in window boxes and taking them with me, I figured I might as well go ahead and get them. It will save the b.h. and I having to pay exorbitant grocery store prices for them in the meantime. So we went back to her house and put some stuff in the dirt, and then watched a preview of Real Housewives of New Jersey, which I have the misfortune of being addicted to and unable to watch for lack of cable. That show is the perfect example of why I don't have cable, actually, because it is fucking awesome and ridiculous and I already don't read enough. So yeah.
And speaking of reading, I finished the first Maisie Dobbs mystery, which i enjoyed but am not gobsmacked by. I have two more that the b.h.'s mom lent me, but they are currently on the back burner. I'm re-reading How Dogs Think by Stanley Coren, with the hope that it will help me help the dogs adjust to our new home more quickly. Still reading Party Out of Bounds, too.
Sunday evening J and M came over for dinner. It was short and sweet and we went to bed at a completely reasonable hour. Woke up in the middle of the night to an unruly thunderstorm, which scared the hell out of Kilgore, who in turn scared the hell out of me. I got him up into the bed and calmed him down pretty quickly, though, and we all went to sleep again.
The boys got their annual haircuts today, and they look hilarious. Again, I'll post pictures when I'm feeling less lazy.
Other than that, I am eagerly awaiting a visit from Tim Easton and company on Thursday, and his show with Todd McBride on Thursday night at the 40 Watt. It has been far too long.

Monday I met A at the bookstore for a couple hours, then went to El Sol for dinner with J(somebody start a meeting for this, please!! "Hi my name is heybartender and I am an ElSoloholic").
Tuesday I met up with MT earlyish and stopped at the Caledonia.
Wednesday I worked and then met the b.h. at the Caledonia for Idiot Slowdown. Today I am off to work again but home early. Tomorrow I open the store, then get out around six and possibly see MT at the Bowling alley, and/or Dave Barbe at the Caledonia, before Still Small Voice and Lake City and Goat at Nuci's. Whew.

Spoiler Alert.

So the new X Men movie. What the fuck? I was entertained, but I can't help having complaints. Hugh Jackman did a whole lot of anguished screaming, which was very tiresome after awhile. And was it really that difficult to find a black guy that could actually act? The b.h. said they used that guy because he's in a band and they could get a "name" without paying for one. He was not good. At least, half the time he sucked. The other half he was fine. Could they not have used the money they spent on Dominic Monewhatsisname to get an actual actor in that role, rather than blowing it on a character with so few lines? Which is not to say that he wasn't great, mind you. But still. And is money really an issue at this point? Haven't these movies already made an assload of money?
Danny Huston channeled Brian Cox perfectly, Ryan Reynolds was funny, but there were too many jokes in general. Liv was great, Agent Zero guy was hit or miss, the exploding helicopter scene was so embarrassing that I laughed out loud in the theater. And adamantium fucking bullets? Really? Was that the best they could do?
I blame the director. Somebody call Bryan Singer, or cancel the rest of these movies, for the love of god.

Yesterday I dropped the b.h. off at work, got breakfast at the bakery, and then came home and went back to sleep for several hours. And then when I got up I got on the couch again. I blame rain and Spain: on the Road Again.

Work is getting dumber by the day, mostly because of the "Socialist Dictator" remarks about the President that I have to endure on a daily basis. It's as if these fuckers have been asleep for the last eight years and are only now waking up to the fact that we're fucked. The toilet was flushed a long time ago, people. We've just been swirling toward the bottom the whole time.

Overheard at the health food store, from a mid-forties redneckish man:
"I don't know son. It's a Diva Cup."
And then louder:
"A Diva Cup!! I don't know what it's for!!"

It's the little things that keep me going.

So they still haven't caught the guy. Great. I can't even talk about the whole thing, really, because no diatribe is going to change anything. i know a lot of people who were present, and thankfully none of them have any serious physical wounds. But it really sucks that they are going to have to live with this shit for the rest of their lives. It's hard to even process and to avoid being corny and/or reactionary I'm just going to shut my pie hole.
In other news, I can't seem to get motivated to do much. Work is pissing me off for various reasons, and I am otherwise incredibly lazy. I have packed a few boxes and done some house cleaning, but I have been generally useless for the past week.
We ate lunch at the National on Tuesday, and I went to A's and had a couple glasses of wine and did some catching up that evening.
Next week is going to be ridiculously busy at work, so I'm hoping to put in a couple extra days in order to fund a trip to New Orleans. My buddy MT and I are talking about it, and it seems like it can be done fairly cheaply (especially if we have a third party, which we may). Luckily I know several people who have lived there, too, so I will have good recommendations for food and whatnot. I've never been to new Orleans and I don't know when I will have the chance to go again, so I hope it works out.
Okay, no more procrastinating. Must... Pack...

No words...

What a day.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/04/25/georgia.shootings/index.html

I decided to nap yesterday instead of getting the lawnmower fixed. It was a good decision, because we had a long night.
I picked the b.h. up from work and we went to El Sol for dinner (yes- again. What?!). Then we came home and he napped and I played with dogs and then we went down to the University to see Dan Savage speak. Savage is a personal hero, and what we refer to as a "Blog Friend", which means a person who you don't really know at all but whom you read so often you feel like you know them. I have been reading his column for fourteen years now, and his blog for a couple. He was as hilarious as I expected him to be, and afterward he went with us for a drink at Flicker. He was exhausted but completely gracious, and we talked for an hour or so and then J and the b.h. and I walked him back to his hotel before heading to the 40 Watt to see Dinosaur Jr. That was awesome. I haven't had a record of theirs for years and years, and was surprised at how many songs I recognized. The show was fantastic, and we all went home very tired but very happy at 2am.

I awoke this morning to THREE e-mails from our new landlord. This is the wife of the pair, and she asked for things that I had already sent her husband a couple (maybe even three) weeks ago. Now I'm worried that the dog breed thing is going to be an issue, when I thought it was long since resolved. Shit. Looked at the housing on Craigsl1st today. Not good. Crossing my fingers.
The past week has been busy and good. Went to lunch with MT last Monday. El Sol again. That is a place I will definitely miss. Spent time on Monday and Tuesday packing and cleaning. Tuesday night the b.h. and I went out with two of our friends J and J, for craft beer and fancy cheese. Yum. Worked Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. Boring! Plus more packing. Then went to Jenn's birthday party on Saturday evening. That was fantastic. Saw many people I don't see enough of. Ate great food. Went home early and passed out. Woke in the middle of the night and stayed awake for too long. Slept in.
Woke up yesterday to no coffee, which is a less terrifying prospect for me than it is for the b.h. Went to the grocery straightaway, then returned home for more packing while he cooked dinner. We went to Stammtisch around six. It was fabulous and I realized that we had missed two weeks in a row which was far too much. The b.h. made oven fried onion rings breaded with saltine crackers and Spicy Thai Kettle Chips. Wow. We came home and watched Doubt, which was way more depressing than I expected. Good, but depressing.
So it was a very long week and pending the answer from the LL this week may be far worse. Balls.
Oh yeah- I backed into our fancy newish lawnmower and ripped off a wheel, too. Guess I ought to get that taken care of now.

Now I know why my manager doesn't like us listening to "Pandora's Box". He already hears voices in his head and this confuses him.
Must. Buy. More. Ammo.
Seriously. The gun nuts are buying up ammo like never before. A guy from the gun shop came in last night and informed us that he is "out of nine" for the first time ever.
"Do you still have forty-five?" inquired Two Gun Stan.
"Plenty."
Great. I can't wait to get out of here.

I have gotten tons of new house photos. It looks great. Of course, at this point it wouldn't take much, but it really does look promising. To celebrate, I am going to walk the dogs and eat a sandwich. Not necessarily in that order.
This week has been long and exhausting, and it isn't over yet. But that pinched nerve in my neck from the constant stress seems to have subsided. Waking up and being able to feel my hands today was comforting.
Now the task of packing. Sorting, throwing out five years of accumulated shite, cleaning... yeah. I guess we've only just begun.

Two notes about work last night. One, I went up to an older gentleman who was perusing the beer selection. I asked if he needed help finding anything. He answered, i gave him some advice, and he then turned and asked my male co worker the exact same question. Pfft. What would I know about beer, right? Just a girl an' all. Fucker.

There was a guy who came in and got a six pack and a pack of cigarettes. I don't know him, exactly, but he is a regular and I recognize him. So the phone rings a couple hours later and it's him. He has lost his wallet and wonders has anyone seen it? I know that it hasn't been found because I was the one who would have found it, but I ask around anyway. No luck.
"I know I had it there and that's the last place I used it and now i can't find it. Can I leave you my number in case?"
"But of course," I say, writing down his name and number. "Have you checked the space between your car seat and the door? I lose my phone there at least once a week."
"I checked the car but I didn't look there."
"I'll give you a call if we find it."

Two minutes later the phone rings again.

"Local Liquor Store, can I help you?"
"You're a genius."
"Have a nice evening."

I believe we have a house. In fact, though I have no signed lease, I am fairly certain that it is what one would call a Done Deal.
Holy crap finally oh my gods etcetera.
The woman who lives there now has been fantastic. She sent me a whole bunch of pictures and suggestions about where to find a job, etc. So now I am on to the collecting boxes/having a yard sale/purging our junk/starting to pack portion of this particular adventure. And it feels good.

I just got back from Savannah. Thought for a minute there I wasn't going to be able to go. Started feeling extra gross at work on Friday night, wound up coming straight home from work instead of going downtown to see the b.h. play. Hot shower, emergen-c packet, and piles of blankets. Slept and watched TV. Woke to pick up the b.h. around two, came home and passed out again, woke up feeling fine. I think the pollen just got to me.
Anyway, we got an early start, went down to Ike and Jane's for breakfast sandwiches and coffee and doughnuts. Drove straight through with only one stop, and went immediately to the club to check in. The band was an hour behind us due to a keys-locked-in-van incident. We headed over to the Sentient Bean for coffee and then to the SCAD shop. I love that place. Student art for sale, and some of it very good. Nothing I could afford that really struck my fancy, though. The band called when they got to the club and we headed back there.
Parking was a bit of a bitch. The club was on River Street, which is the mainest of main drags on the riverfront (thus the name), which was packed with people because of the absolutely lovely weather. Having already made that mistake once, the b.h. and I decided instead to park several blocks away and walk with both of his guitars and his suitcase o' pedals and such. No problem. Then we stood around for an eternity waiting for the other band to load out. We didn't really mind, though, because we were able to buy beer and stand out on the street drinking it. We did because we could, and because of the aforementioned incredible weather. After that was load in and soundcheck, which I managed to avoid most of by walking down the waterfront with R while the b.h. checked and leaving when the other band did.
The b.h. and D and I walked over to the Moon River Brewery and waited at the bar for the other guys. I had a Swamp Fox IPA. It was delicious.
We were seated in the main room, still waiting for the other guys to arrive from sound check. D had his back to the front door. Through the crowd I saw some frat boys and sorostitutes in Full Confederate Regalia, and they were making their way in our direction. When they passed our table, D looked up in disgust and said quite loudly "You guys are hilarious", in a tone indicating that he did not, in fact, find it hilarious.
I find the whole thing quite confusing myself. The fascination with a war that no one ever spoke of outside of history class where I come from. Technically those people were traitors, and since many if not all of those people claim to be patriots, I don't see why they feel the need to celebrate. Also, I can't imagine how the black people who were present (waiters and bartenders in this case) must feel at the sight of these people, but since I am not a real Southerner I more often than not feel like the best bet is to keep my mouth shut. As far as I am concerned, these people might as well be walking around in KKK robes or Nazi uniforms, but generally I am able to simply ignore it. Not so with D. He was obviously pissed (in both senses of the word, I now realized), and made it known. I was worried that we were only three and they appeared to be younger, more fit, and in greater numbers. Not that I am afraid of a broad in a hoopskirt, mind you, but the boys were definitely of the large and cornfed variety. Luckily the rest of the guys showed up just then, and we were distracted by food and fun.
I ordered onion rings and a dip-thingie made from cream cheese, sundried tomatoes, and roasted garlic to share with everybody, and leek and goat cheese cakes for myself. This is what I had last time we were here, and though I prefer to be more adventurous, there were not a lot of veggie options. I was very happy with all of my selections.
AT one point I stepped outside for a smoke break with R, again mostly because it was beautiful out and I could bring my beer along, and the first guy I saw was in a confederate uniform. I asked if I could take my picture with him, and could I please hold his sword? Then I found out that he was the Haunted Savannah Tour Guide.
"Oh, so you're not really a racist, you just get paid to wear that, huh?" I smirked. Holding the sword point to his throat was not near as fun.
Another fratty couple came up in uniform and I got a picture with them. It's one of those "the folks back home are never gonna believe this" things. By back home, of course, I mean Chicago. No one in Athens will have trouble believing.
We returned to the club stuffed to the gills and waited a short time for the bands to start playing. It was a fun show but a long one, and we were all ready to get to sleep when it was over.
Hilariously, River street was now blocked on one side with illegally parked cars, and on the other was a very long, seemingly immobile line of traffic. Two of the guys wound up walking back two blocks to get the van, then we waited while they sat in traffic, then we blocked traffic while all scrambling to get the gear in. The guys in the little SUV immediately behind the van seemed totally relaxed, watching us calmly through the windshield while thumping bass poured from their over-sized speakers. In fact, nobody honked or complained at all, which was odd but a relief. There was simply no other way for us to load out. No one from the club bothered to help us, despite there being at least two young and able-bodied men right next to the door and absolutely no business now that the bands had finished. I doubt they'll be going back there.
We spent all day Sunday walking around. The guys went home early, and the b.h. and I had the whole day to ourselves, knowing that our capable dog-sitter would be staying at least until two. We got breakfast at Clary's which I found mostly disappointing this time, and then coffee at the Sentient Bean (again), and walked through square after square all the way to the river from the far side of Forsyth Park. Then we walked down the river and turned back, this time walking a very different and less populated set of squares. We stopped in a lovely French decor shop, which D had mentioned the day before. I fell in love with a piece of art that was $1400. Of course. Champagne taste and a beer budget, as they say. I bought a greeting card and we continued on. The walk was fantastic, the weather perfect. We decided that were we to move to Savannah, this would be the neighborhood we would live in. I took a ton of pictures. There are so many tiny details on houses and gates there. It's like a treasure hunt in a way. I love (visiting) that place.
After we got back to the car we bought refills and pastries and started home.
The drive was uneventful, and when we returned we found treasure, in the form of school loan documents, waiting in the mailbox. Hoo-fucking-ray.

Iowa!

Gay marriage. Iowa. Hooray for Iowa. And sanity.
That is all.

Yesterday I spoke to what I hope will be my next landlord. He isn't sure that he and his wife are actually ready to rent the house again, but since they had only found out thirty-six hours prior that their current tenants are leaving, I was unruffled. I think I managed to be entirely agreeable in my eagerness, though, so we'll see. Part of the problem is that he has a list of dog breeds that his insurance company won't cover, and German Shepherd is on it.
"My dogs are each half Shepherd", I said. One is half corgi and less than a foot and a half tall, so I don't think it counts. The other looks like Benji, and I seriously doubt that your insurance man would peg him for a Shepherd."
Actually, I prefer the comparison to Nick Nolte's Mug Shot, first made by my good buddy Mic Harrison, but I wasn't sure the LL would find that as hilarious as I do.
I sent him these pictures for verification:







I think I've made a fairly convincing case, don't you?

After I sent the message I found another potential house on cr@igsl1st, which is nice. I sent a message to that person and then I called Shayne and went to her house so I would stop obsessively checking for responses every three minutes. I stayed there until it was time to go to work.
Work was very long. The weather is making me very sleepy, and I think it is keeping people at home, because we were not busy in the least.
Today I slept in gloriously late and have finally finished off enough coffee to function properly.
Two more days of work and then it's off to Savannah. I can't wait.